Nothing like a broken freezer to start your day…

In my never ending quest to try and be more “green,” I bought an electric lawn mower about a year or so ago. Unfortunately, it’s a lawn mower of the corded variety, so I end up dragging along a 100 foot extension cord while mowing my lawn. It’s not a huge lawn, but it’s big enough that I really should have a riding lawn mower. I’m used to it, but it’s a pain.


About three weeks ago, I was finishing up my last strip of lawn when the mail carrier drove by. Trying to be friendly, I turned and waved, and turned back to the mower just in time to see the cord go under the mower deck and SNAP! I just mowed over my extension cord. Damn. Well, at least my lawn was mostly done (except for the odd strip that we called the soul patch) and no one was hurt. No harm, no foul.

Oh, but there was harm, dear reader. There was harm.

That harm was realized at about 7:30 this morning. I went out to the chest freezer in the garage for some hashbrowns. I didn’t need to turn on the light because I knew where they were, and there was just enough light from the windows in the garage door. I open the freezer and the first thing I notice is that my hashbrowns are…well…brown. That’s odd… and then it hit me. The overwhelming odor of rotting flesh and putrefaction. I stuck my hand in the freezer. “Oh shit. Everything’s warm!” I thought. I checked the stacks of once-frozen, homemade chicken stock. Liquid. Fuck.

I go inside, and tell my husband what happened. As I’m telling him, I reach up to scratch an itch on my nose. Ugh! The scent is on my hands. Of course, I make him smell just how bad it is. Someone has to share my pain. By this point, the scent has already permeated the laundry room, which is right off of the garage.

What does this have to do with my lawn? Well, all of the outlets in the garage and apparently on the outside of the house are on one breaker. When I ran over the extension cord, I inadvertently tripped the breaker and shut off my freezer. How long ago was that? Oh…about a month ago. So I’ve had rotting chicken broth, veggies, chicken breasts, fish, and about three inches of water sitting in my freezer in an 80+ degree garage for the past month. Our task today is to somehow clean it out without vomiting and spreading the scent to the other areas of the house.

Good luck, right? Ugh.

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